At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
I feel like a fucked a broomstick last night. You get a gold star.
Oh. And what's the twitter protocol for following the guy you blew behind a shed?
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I think i can hear god laughing at me and yelling "thou shall pay for thy habits of underage drinking" through a megaphone directly at my eardrums
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
Drinking Hot Toddies on the Porch and blasting bob dylans "hurricane" bring it on sandy!
I guess I'm just gonna have to learn to live with the fact that I'm the guy who takes his pants off at the party and tries to start an orgy
I need an IV, a new head, and stronger morals.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
