I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
I don't usually arrange sex via text message
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres a truck parked on the front yard and i just want to take this opportunity to tell you now that it is not my fault.
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
No she stopped screaming. Now she's eating popcorn. Off a plate. With a spoon.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
Just saw some dude tumble down the stairs of the bar while leaving...fist pump...and then sprint down the road
Thank god for federal credentials. Waaaaayyyy to hungover to go through airport security lines right now.
Why the fuck is there a picture of us jumping a girl that's wearing my chicken mask?
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
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