who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I wish you could order shots online.
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
She's beautiful tan and skinny she will make me hate myself and that's what I need in a friend right now
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I'm having leftover pizza for breakfast. I'm clearly not the greatest at this adult thing.
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
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