i would give spencer pratt a bj just so i could bite his dick off
he'd just find a way to get more famous from being a eunich.
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
Just took my morning after pill in the library
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
I think after 8 tries we can say Stoli Thursdays cause too much damage.
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Ya know what's the worst? Being drunk and wanting to show someone a picture of your goddaughter but not wanting to open the pictures on your phone because the first one is of someone's dick..
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
