Omfg I am plowed. Had drinks with 3 milfs. Going out on their boat tomorrow. They want to show me how buoyant they are.
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Summer bikini season begins today. I hereby declare the commencement of the 2013 HUNT FOR CUNT.
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
I just saw a raccoon get launched out of a tree by another raccoon. They have turf wars...
How much weed can I reasonably smoke now if I have to leave for work in a bit over an hour
Randomize
