Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
i chased bacardi with meat sauce last night
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
I'm batshit crazy. I don't know how you guys keep forgetting that
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Randomize
