I sent her a Relationship Request on Facebook last night, she accepted and we fucked.. I changed my Relationship Status to Single, I think she'll get the point
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
They seemed upset when they walked out and saw a penis in a mouth
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
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