Going back to my hometown to drink absinthe with highschool boys. Remind me to evaluate this decision tomorrow.
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
She had her underwear around her neck. No one can tell me i'm a slut now.
sitting in my room in a shopping cart. they couldnt get my legs out of the holes. i want breakfast.
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hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
She pulled a wad of lint out of my bellybutton while she was blowing me. Said she's never seen anything like it. I've never gone soft so fast.
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
do u know what happened to the bottles last night?
apparently we hid them.... i google mapped the location into my phone
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i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
I still have a little drunk in my system
I slept naked last night on stolen pillows. I felt like a golden goddess.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
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