It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
I think need to divide my DVD collection into "movies I've seen" and "movies I've only seen during sex"
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
You sir are most definitely in. Better get your penis an umbrella as that bad boy is gonna get soakkkkkkeddddd.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I just made out with Ricky Ullman of Phil of the Future fame and I don't know what I'm doing anymore. Help.
Well I can't go home with anyone tonight bc I stuffed my bra
I also fell asleep on the side of a tree so like I hit my lowest point there but it was a good time
Not as bad as when you were sitting in the pond getting fed water
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize
