You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Thought I woke up to a girl giving me a handy. It was a male nurse inserting a catheter.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
I've hit an all time low of asking baristas what would go good with marshmallow vodka. I think I might hire one to party with all of us. To make hangover drinks
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
When / where did the additional couches appear?
Additional?
James brought one with him when he showed up. Theres still 2 outside and according to facebook, at least one more burned up.
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
Randomize