It's Friday. Sex?
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
she's sitting here naked with heels and a taco.
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
It's just a matter of time. The ball is in my court. Soon to be in her mouth.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
Dude. That's like masturbating until the point that you're going to climax, then stopping, waiting for a few seconds and then starting all over. While that does lead to an altogether more powerful orgasm, it's still annoying as hell until you get there.
I was not expecting that analogy.
No one ever expects that analogy.
The progression was banging a stripper banging an unemployed stripper banging a sexual entrepreneur quarantining with benefits totally fucking whipped. Get it right dude
Randomize
