Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
just tell him i said nine months
the coke olympics were a bad idea. there's a tree uprooted in the front of my building.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
Well I met my booty call's parents by accident, so that happened.
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I just want to sit in my tub, drugged out of my mind, and watch the green lantern cartoon while the world as we know it ceases to exist outside my bathroom door, Okay? Is that REALLY too much to ask?
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
My breath smells like gin and sadness
FYI brushing your teeth & taking off your makeup does not erase the shame from the night before
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