you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Like did I tell you about the ex Amish guy? Because that was a mess
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
That's MADAM THUNDERCUNT to you
He had a hook in his ceiling. I think I'm in love!
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
Randomize
