My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
My moms helping me unpack but im getting a little nervous because I dont remember where i put my dildo
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
It was my penance. God came down to me in the form of an angel and said, "you must atone for your sins, by puking in your mouth at church right before communion"
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
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