Fine. I'll sleep in my office
it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
he told me I talked like a deaf person
i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
I tried to put a seat belt on in the shower. And I'm 80% sure I ate soap.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can get stoned and we can bake and then I can eat 70% of it and it will be awesome
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
I think it's safe to assume that dad heard you lose your lesbian virginity last night
Wanna bang and Pregame work? I know you're the manager just promise to not fire me
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
We were totally high while having sex, I told him fast or slow, just follow your balls. That was a show stopper.
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