This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
Stop whining I left you with whiskey
YOU LEFT ME WITH WHISKEY ALONE IN A CABIN IN THE MIDDLE OF NOWHERE I AM GOING TO DIE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We'll just charge in there, all pant less and fabulous demanding he give back her ferret.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
If I ever go to jail it will be because of you, I can feel it.
When ur uncle gives you free weed, you take it
I mean go ahead and let your freak flag fly but if you could not fly it in my bed that would be great
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
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