Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
Why the FUCK can i grow hair on my big toes but not on my chest?
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
she called for a booty call so i sent mike as my stunt double
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I decided that Calgary can keep my underwear. They earned it.
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
There are rocks in my bed. And dirt all over my face. Explain?
I got us chalkboard mugs. Now whoever comes home with us can feel comfortable in the morning! I am too considerate to my one-night stands...
Mom brought home a 36 pack of Smirnoff and was all "ring any bells?" and then winked. I'm scared. What does she know?
I think I should just accept my destiny that I'm going to be someone's second wife
My tits sealed my fate
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Your penis caused this!
Randomize
