How did currency from Costa Rica make it's way into my wallet...?
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
... and smoked a joint with my new landlord. I'm starting to like Germany.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
It wouldn't be New Years Eve if we knew where we would be at midnight
Hypothetically speaking - is it bad if you get cut off at an airport bar at 11:30am?
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
He started out in my roommates bed and by the end of the night was in mine, not sure how that went down. But he left happy in the morning.
Steven and I talked about running for office again today. It's fucked that my 3 dream jobs are marijuana bakery owner, bar owner, and president.
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
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