Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
oh, it's pms. I almost cried yesterday bc my roommates didn't seem perky enough when I got home.
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
I say we go and bring jello shots with laxatives. 57% sure one of his toilets is broken
They never prepare you for how broke ur gonna be in college. I just accepted money from two underage girls at a gas station to buy them beer only because I'm trying to figure out a way to run off with it without them noticing.
Dude, use it to buy them beer. Then run the beer to ur car as fast as you can and bring it to the party. Seriously, we're running out of booze over here
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
I love how when he said ecstasy pills both of our heads whipped around like a couple of horned owls.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize