i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
no, i remember trying to staple my nipples together. I just can't figure out where the hell stapler came from.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
Just gave candy to a strange child. Not my best move.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
He showed up to a booty call with 2 tea bags, but no condom...
I need a hoe opinion
go on
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
Randomize
