I am puke
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
Just once, I'd like to hook up with a girl that doesn't look like she's having a near-fatal seizure when I give her an orgasm.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
Dude I turned down free booze. I think I'm growing as a person.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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