make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept calling herself DJ McDonalds and said she wanted to make some Egg McMusic.
Also I am throwing a blaZer over what I wore to bed and calling it an outfit.
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
He had been licking my nipple for like 5 minutes and it wouldn't get hard. He asked me to lick my own and when I did, instant hardness. I realized I'd rather have sex with myself then this guy ..
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