Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
Our hot neighbor just came over and asked for a toilet plunger...not so hot anymore
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
How do you not remember seeing the kid from our chem lab table and repeatedly yelling "lab partners for life!" at him?
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
I'm posted up in the bathroom at au bon pain, high as balls, experimenting with eyeshadow combinations and listening to 90s jlo. The girl in the stall next to me just plopped a big one and I laughed, hope I ruined her day
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I don't think you should say "suck my dick" and then proclaim to be a messiah, of any sort.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
Randomize
