Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Just had a horrible realization. I've fucked a guy with a webbed foot AND a guy with a third nipple.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I knew it was on when all she had to say about the handcuffs was 'I really hope these adjust tighter!'
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
My mother expressed her concerns about my drinking via a facebook message.
he high fived his dick after we had sex
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