everyone knows that carl winslow was the sexiest man in die hard.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
it's official, i've been high in 26 different states, and three different countries.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
Can you send me a picture of your dog? I might need to borrow him so I can wear a speedo to a pool party on Friday
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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