That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Spotted on freeway- girl in ford focus takes a hit from a 7 inch pipe while knee driving. She winked at me. I want her life.
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
When you wake up and wonder why your bleeding and it feels like you jumped into a ceiling fan, dont worry. Ill explain it all when I wake up.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Randomize
