try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
No, I was feeling sad because all of the other girls were like model-skinny. But then I remembered that I had big boobs and went to hit on their boyfriends.
she just asked me to help her create a twitter page for edward cullen's hair.... seriously.
nope im down the street in my car watching the front of her house. its actually less creepy than it sounds
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
Dude, my sex life is so sad since I started having feelings.
Sleeping with just one person sucks
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
She'd probably like you more if you'd stop fucking her husband.
She swallowed the car key because she thought we were really going to make her drive.
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
Randomize
