I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
Why do I always give away anal sex as birthday presents?
Shut up... one mans birthday cake is another mans sodomy my friend
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
The moment I was petting the giraffe was the moment I passed out
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
Randomize