no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
just realized I'm too high to take the plastic off a slice of cheese....
I think you're the first person to ever call Louisville, KY a "romantic getaway".
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
Dontating $10 to the Red Cross relief effort in Japan for every car bomb I take tomorrow. Yes, buying me a drink just became a good cause.
You blacked out and then went around stealing other peoples phones and leaving yourself voicemails
I got two from random numbers, the first was me and said "Don't forget you murdered Josh in Wii Bowling"
The second Jenn said "You are ridiculously smart for drunk dialing yourself"
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I'm 99% sure I just flashed my dad with my vagina. So that's the new low now.
She knew the head wasn't all that so she gave me her taco. I'm will in to give her a second chance.
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
He told me I'm a small core of pure evil wrapped up in sweetness, gold, and puppies. He gets me.
That is beautiful
It's times when I'm naked but also want to be platonically social that I miss you the most.
Ugh. My life is a never ending cycle of bad decisions and taquitos.
U wanna come over and watch talidaga nights. Ill make pancakes
What? It's 130 in the morning.
Aww come on i make bomb ass pancakes
Randomize
