have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
He posted a picture of my bra on facebook with the caption "I don't know who I hooked up with last night but if this is yours please come pick it up".
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
I still havent gotten an apartment yet, so I crash random college parties...get so drunk and then sleep on their couch
he told me he didn't know whether he was gonna puke, pass out, or cum. i don't know if i should be flattered or offended.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
My masturbation fantasy just had a wedding theme. I need new hobbies.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
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