I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
i stole $50 bucks from my girlfriends purse to pay for my other girls abortion pill...shes gonna be pissed
I don't even know what he looks like, all i've seen of him is his dick
the rest of him looks just as crooked
these 2 russian guys walked past me and i got freaked out because i thought call of duty got real
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Have you ever had one of those moments when you kept whispering to yourself "I'm not a slut, I'm not a slut..."?
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
I am at 99 matches in less than 24 hours, I need a tinder rehab program
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