My grandmother just called to say she disowned me. Apparently I uploaded a video to Youtube of me dancing nude with a blow-up doll named Dorothy, last night. You are so fired from being damage control.
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
Someone is gonna learn how to start an IV in the morning
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
Taking my underwear off at work was one of my better decisions this weekend
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
Got so high i fell asleep kyaking...for 2 hours.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
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