very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
I got so drunk I pissed the bed last night. He still likes me. He's a keeper
He is a keeper. You on the other hand are not.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
I had to use the resin knife to take the staples out of my tax return forms. Tax returns and a search warrant?
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
You don't understand. He was so ginger that he could make red hair a dominant gene. And I refuse to torture my future spawn like that.
Hes wearing a shirt that says warning shitshow and i cant help but think his attorney made him wear it so ppl know the dangers.
Whatever happend to that lawsuit where he got sued for shittig in that fish tank
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
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