Kicked off drink for Jesus month by puking in my mouth while talking to my priest...real cool
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
yeah bitch needs to recognize there's only one person with this face
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
I just banged that chick from the bar by speaking french. all i had to do was recite my grocery list
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
it was like where's waldo, only the stakes were much higher.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
I see more hoeing in ur future
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