We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
whoever brushed my teeth and whitened them while i was passed out, thanks.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
He could stay over, if you'd just ask.
Yeah. What am I supposed to say? "Oh, my couch is occupied, but my vagina's not"
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
I stole a tiki torch last night and just returned it. Things have been better.
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
yeah the cops just showed up and they got there ass handed to them at beer pong.
I cannot believe all 4 of us had sex at the same time, in the same bed... And it didn't turn into a foursome..
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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