i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
I just decorated my birth control case with Lisa Frank stickers. If that doesn't scream 'I'm not ready for babies' I don't know what does.
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
At least I look tastefully trashed. My nipples are hidden and I'm standing up.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Yeahhh, everybody is so helpful when a pretty girl is crying hysterically and has only one shoe and a six pack.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
