"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
he shaved USA in his pubs
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
I bought a sword. Make the proper arrangements.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
You look wasted in ALL of the pictures I just saw you in.
That can't be good for your liver!
Thanks for caring mom.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
Randomize
