stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
Randomize