Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
That and I was watching this life alert commercial and I'm pretty sure my liver turned up the volume for more information
I just realized that in 3 weeks it becomes sad if I make everything into a drinking game. Fuck growing up
Finally smoked with my brothers, I feel like I just won gold at the Best Older Brother Ever Olympics
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
But I don't wanna live with them bc I need to be able to walk around naked and sex on any surface guilt free.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Randomize
