Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
i just watched a video of two girls fucking with a banana and i thought of you.
i hate you
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
It just feels wrong masturbating with my neighbor's cat in my apartment
you were sleeping on the floor, then you woke up and told me you were not comfy enough. You took the carpet in the bathroom put it in the bath and you slept there.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Call me when your ready for an explanation about the ham in your vagina.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
Had sex on your trumpet just an fyi.
She said she hasn't cheated on me in 7 and a half days and she'd like praise for that.
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
