We need to find a way to make penises more like hookahs.
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
I'm never going out with the ashleys again. it was whoreible. terrifyingly whoreible.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
Randomize
