Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
I just wanna buy a tempur-pedic so i can drink in bed and not spill
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
Note to self: if you decide to go to the gym when you're coming down from your day high to shoot some hoops, do NOT play pickup basketball with the big black dudes who need a sixth
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
She was shaving her legs in the neighbors pool when we found her.
Where'd she get the razor?
Not the point.
Randomize
