Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
You are number one in my heart. But in the dick Olympics you're disqualified.
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
Executive order 941: BRING ME THE FINEST PANCAKES!
You have got to stop watching the West Wing before going out.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
You have the most beautiful penis I've ever seen. I never thought penises were meant to be beautiful, but you proved me wrong
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
Did I honestly think it was a good idea to wear my pink robe out in public at 2 in the morning ?
Randomize
