My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
My parents foreign exchange student just walked in on me whacking off. Welcome to America :)
Put cigar in mouth backwards. Plz remind to check for scar in morning, can't feel it now. Screwdrivers are like morphine.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
we've talked on the toilet we're linked now
Dude. If you guys end up really liking each other, the color of his pubes won't matter. I wouldn't break a sweat.
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