I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
All the good ones are taken. All that's left is the Harry Potter geek or the asshole in the corner. I think I'll settle for Harry Potter.
im so bored in class... i just made a pie graph of my favorite bars and a bar graph of my favorite pies
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
I rode a bull tonight, There is absolutely no reason my dick is not in some chicks mouth
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
My mom just asked if I wanted a mimosa when I got out of the bath.
I think everything's gonna be okay.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Randomize
