Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
he acted like he had never seen anyone snort lines of adderall off of a microwave before. freshman.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
It's pretty telling that my resolutions all involve who I will sleep with in 2014.
It's important to play to your strengths.
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Randomize
