we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Just so you know swallowing does not help chest colds. Your Phd can suck my dick
I didn't cheat on him. He just hasn't been informed of the open part of our relationship.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I bet the guy on the treadmill next to me with the noise-canceling headphones wishes he could trade them for smell-canceling noseplugs. Hard to believe that last one did not involve any pants-shitting on my part.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
