why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
she was so hung over that i had to hold her hair while she puked in a trash can in the middle of the student center as new freshman and their parents walked by.
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Learning to live poor pretty well. Cashed in all the coins in my car for nearly 60 bucks and yelled at a Pizza Hut manager, insisting I have a free pizza credit, until he just gave me a pizza.
You know, this is NOT how I pictured my life would be when I was younger, and yet here we are.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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