naighbors jacking off again. i swear its his friday night ritual, its like he knows the night wont be ending in his favor
he started fingering my stomach rolls instead of my vag... am i really that fat?
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I think I have internal bruising from those poses we were doing last night. My own ribs hurt me. I don't understand.
so now that i'm sober i just want to apologize for violating your back seat...... on a brighter note thank you for playing the little mermaid song "kiss the girl," really set the mood.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
Fuck you for setting me up with the guy from the Nickelback cover band
Payback for not stopping me from fucking the guy in the wookie costume
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
so as he was cumming he sort of growled with one eye squinted... for a moment there I thought I was fucking Popeye
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Randomize