Funny thing- my attraction to each one is inversely proportional to his level of availability.
I'm like a new puppy, everybody wants to touch me
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
I take back everything I said about communal showers
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I. Did. In fact. Sprain. My liver. This. Weekend.
There are many penises to be discovered and claimed tonight
We're like Lewis and Clark
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
I can't decide which is better: the sex, or remembering that I have ice cream in the freezer after he left
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
Randomize
